It has been a hectic month so far, so hectic, I haven’t even really had the time to write for MAGS. Today, I have set aside some time to do it…as I think I need to!!
This month, I have had so many things going on…and not enough hours in the day. My body does not like it when I try to do too much now (stupid, stupid body!! It didn’t used to be like this!! What I wouldn’t give to have a younger body – with the knowledge and experience I have now! A better, more energetic me!!). I want to do so much more, but I get to a certain time of day, and I can’t think, and I just want to lay down and sleep.
Everything seems to take it out of me! Now, I have spoken on here before how menopause can cause fatigue, a feeling of weakness, but add in a few mood swings (and anyone who says a mood swing isn’t exhausting, is a big fat liar!)
So, I have been trying to work on three different projects, and today, I am so tired, that I just want to cry….WHAT IS WITH THAT!! Then, I have moments of getting angry with myself, and then, back to wanting to cry. Even this morning, one small thing happened (I stabbed my eye with my eyeliner pencil – didn’t hurt, was just not focusing properly!) and promptly burst into tears….no idea why….then got angry with myself for being such an idiot!! We have a pet bunny rabbit, and she was just sitting staring at me (probably wondering how she ended up in a family with such a loopy woman!!)
It never ends…I am not working tomorrow, but all I can think about is stuff I need to get done. My mind is in overdrive, and because I just cannot work as fast as I used to, I get even more frustrated and that slows me down even more. Just as well I have a diary now – without it, I would be lost, as to top everything off, my memory is not at its best either (yep, I do remember I have spoken about that before as well!! Lucky!! I might have started going off on a tangent!)
So, I decided to take an hour out to write this….purely for my own sanity…I needed a little rant as being so tired and having mood swings all the time is just so frustrating. Sorry, but you lovely people are the ones who drew the short straw and had to listen to this today (my poor long suffering husband has heard enough about all this I am sure!)
I really would like to have more energy, be less tired, less moody and have a better memory…
I am off to punch my Menopausal Mood Pillow…and then down to work…let the madness begin (or carry on really!!!)